Who would think that an innocent banana would evoke an emotional response?
It’s amazing how a mundane activity can stop you in your tracks. Jeepers used to wait behind me for her share of bananas when I was cutting them up for my smoothies. So now it’s hard to cut up bananas without tearing up and remembering how happy Jeepers was to get some.
The tears have been less frequent. And at some point I'll write a blog post about something else, I promise. But for now, I continue to honor the memories and I'd like to share someone else's story as well.
I have a co-worker friend whose childhood dog had to be put down a few days ago. No one is ever prepared to consider that your dog with whom you spent your formative years, will no longer be in your life. She was devastated.
She was there for Sophie’s last breath, alone. Her mom couldn’t bear to stay in the room.
As anyone might imagine, my friend is struggling to work through her grief. It’s still a very fresh wound, and this isn’t something she had yet to encounter in her adult life.
I shared with her some information that animals have shared with me after their passing. The most frequent questions I have been asked from clients during readings, is whether their pet suffered, or whether they let them go to soon, or if they waited too long to let them pass. In every encounter so far, when those questions were asked, no animal has shown me anything but love for their human and for what they did for them. They show me how they are free from the burden of a body that didn’t want to work anymore. They send waves of warmth and overwhelming love to convey their messages of comfort to their grieving humans.
As my friend attempts to navigate her new normal, the hardest part, she is finding, is that some of the people close to her do not understand why she is “still upset”. What? It has been only a few days? Are you kidding?
I am so lucky to be surrounded by people who would never fault me for becoming emotional over bananas, or for accidentally leaving a little bit of my Indian food on my plate for Jeepers and then remembering that she wasn’t there to eat it.
There is no timeline for grief. If your loved one is unable to function on a daily basis or is so overwhelmed by grief that you are concerned for their well-being, get them some help. Whether it's from a counselor, therapist, or intuitive communicator, just help them. Find out what they need. Allow them the space to honor their feelings and their memories. They’ll love you more for it later.
In memory of Sophie.